BEER. CHIPS.

The team has discovered that we can observe and research your actions and behavior just as easily from this big comfy couch as we could from our consoles.

And my oh my, the Earthbound invention of deep-fried potato slices and fermented oats and hops! Well done indeed.

We have just been informed that instead of moving yourself towards objects, you stay in one place and employ a control that handles things remotely.

BRILLIANT!

THE PAIN...

The human central nervous system is fascinating.

TEST SUBJECTS WANTED

Due to severe lack of judgment (and good old common sense) on behalf of one of our colleagues, we have recently "lost" several participants in our standard Human Physical Anatomical Structure & Movement lab.

If you are interested in exploring (or being explored) by the vast resources of advanced civilization, please contact the Alien Science Team asap.

Dr. Shank's position within the infrastructure is being fully reevaluated.

GREETINGS FROM YOUR NEW OVERLORDS! (LOL just kidding*)

We are here! On behalf of the rest of the team, I would very much like to thank you all for allowing us to study your kind.

Against the opinions of rest of the unit, our own Dr. Shank would like to apologize at this time for the delay in getting our department fully operational. Rest assured that despite the delay, we are quite excited about getting started and we are fully ready to work.

All the best from us to you.

Oh, and please go on about your normal business. Remember: WE ARE ONLY HERE TO OBSERVE YOU.

-Dr. Nayr Small & The Alien Science Team

*or ARE we? (LOL)**

**We probably aren't